The water battle. A brief tale about how the dwarves celebrated Dingus Day.

cermigiusz2Easter holidays flew by so quickly … What did the Dwarfs do at that time? Well … we could tell you about how little chicks took over Wroclaw, how Papa Dwarf and the hare fought for city domination, or how the dwarves tried to convince Dumplinger that these are not the right holidays and those few thousand (!) Russian dumplings he made are not really necessary. Nevertheless, there is one story that really needs to be told.

 Dyngus Day is the second favourite day for all the dwarves, just after April Fool’s Day. Yes, yes, they love to throw water at each other. As soon as several weeks before Dyngus Day the dwarves hide buckets, water pistols, special eggs and other gnomes inventions in various corners of the city. They start the celebrations just after midnight on Monday. They happily splash each other with water, saving no one in the process. So if on this Monday the streets seemed oddly wet and as if a bit cleaner, then you know who is behind it.

 There is, however, a group of Dwarves in Wroclaw who love water exceptionally much. They are not afraid of deep waters at all. For them it doesn’t make any difference whether it is the city swimming pool, a fountain or the local “queen” the Oder. This time the dwarves wanted to celebrate the day in a special way – with a real water battle on the Oder. Previously, they submitted a special request to the Dwarf Council to grant them permission to organize a tournament. Papa Dwarf initially refused to give them permission. After all, the river was preparing for its own celebration – the Day of the Ode. The river needed peace, not such an ordeal. However, after Neptune’s visit he changed his mind. Why? We can only guess … Half of the city heard the loudly sung shanties. Papa Dwarf made one condition though: only “water” dwarves can take part in the battle. Other dwarves cannot swim and it would be too dangerous.

 The participants of the tournament (called lovingly “Watermen”) met shortly after midnight from Sunday to Monday, where the Northern Oder meets the South Ode. The Captain Twins , Nerida and Victoria arrived by their ships. Cermag, who was swimming in his bathtub, was also there. Bubble-spiller also appeared at the start line with his inseparable companion – the ducky. Captain Jack Porter , Water-keeper with his buckets, and Splasherbelly and Wetheeler with their bowls also had to be there .There were also Slopper and Bubbler on specially constructed rafts. Neptune, who proudly circled the river with his trident, was elected the referee of the tournament. Rescuer and Helper were making sure that everyone is safe.

The rules? They were not well thought out. Actually, there were no rules. Fun itself was most important. Our Water Dwarves were enjoying the fact that they could splash everyone and everything with water without any restrictions. Did they fight to the last dry thread? Well, if it was so then the war would be over after 5 minutes. So who won? The one who staysed on the battlefield the longest. What was the prize? The title of the Prince of the Oder on the day of the celebrations (Neptune’s position is non-negotiable – there can only be one king).

 30 minutes after midnight they finally began! They immediately began to move along Dunikowski Boulevard, towards the Bridge of Peace. Buckets, bowls, popular eggs and pistols were most popular. But let’s not forget that this was a true battle and the Dwarves also prepared slingshots, large catapults and water cannons. They had ammunition all around them. As you may guess, after a short moment all the dwarves were soaking wet. They were not scared either by the wind nor by the low temperature – they carried on. What about the rest of the dwarf brothers? Non-Watermen watched these skirmishes from the shore. At first they gathered at the surrounding bridges: Piaskowy and Tumski and Piotr Włostowic Boulevard. Later, they started to run along the Odra River through the Museum Footbridge, under the Bridge of Peace all the way to the Grunwald Bridge. Some of them decided that the roof of the House on Water is the perfect viewing point.

 However, a careful observer would notice that several dwarves were missing. Well, Dialgomir , a well-known Wroclaw lazybones, chose to watch television (no, the battle was not broadcast). And Goldie and Lucky felt the charm of adventure and slipped on board of one of the ships unnoticed. Although they both put on life jackets they did not protect them from a disaster. The watermen were floating towards the ZOO and were just passing under Polinka. Neptune only managed to wonder why the cable car was hanging in the middle when something suddenly fell on Goldie. He only had time to shout out: “My coins!” and fell into the water dragging Lucky with him. Fortunately, Rescuer and Helper hurried to the rescue and, using their paddles, saved the “castaways”. The dwarves were safe and sound even though they lamented quite a lot. Goldie lost his treasure (well, in fact only a small part of it) and Lucky’s four-leaf clover got all wet.

 Why did the accident happen? Our charming Alpinists decided to join in on the fun. Since they are not afraid of heights, they climbed the gondola and threw bags of water from it. Well, this is the whole story. But why was the cable car not at the station? – you ask. Well, we will just say that Drunky was found in it after everything was over…

 This is how the first dwarf battle in the history of Wroclaw ended. The Prince of the Oder was not chosen (to the delight of Neptune). Will this event permanently enter the urban tradition? The Dwarf Council will decide on this. Now is the time to sing shanties and prepare the Oder for its celebration.